SuperDads?

Article and image courtesy of Flexibility

the online journal of flexible work at www.flexibility.co.uk

DISCLAIMER : The views expressed in this article are not necessarily those of Progress Enterprise.

The latest twist on "having it all"

"A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house."

Well, so it said on one of those humorous lists that my daughter forwards to me by email. Leaving aside its complete inappropriateness for my own active new-man-style parenting, of course, I can agree that it may contain some kernel of truth about the male condition in general. A man's place is at work....isn't it?

Modern notions of equality, in fact, hold that a woman's place can equally be at work. But, according to Dad's Army: The case for father-friendly workplaces, a new report by Richard Reeves of the Work Foundation, while women have largely won the arguments for family-friendly policies and practices in the workplace, neither men nor their employers have yet got to grips with the dual roles required by fatherhood and career.

A generational thing

The report argues that there is a generational divide in the workplace:

"..the one between fathers in their fifties and those in, say, their thirties. Most of the former group have wives who stayed at home to raise their kids, at least in their pre-school years. Most of the latter group have wives or partners who work."

And, it is argued, the "dinosaur dads" are the ones who currently occupy the most senior positions, and "have a disproportionate influence on workplace cultures".

"True," writes Reeves, "Many of them have woken up to the fact that they now employ mothers. But few have paid attention to the fact that they now employ a different kind of father".

The modern father generally wants to be more actively involved at home. So do his children, and so does his partner. It is the expectations of the male role at work that gets in the way.

For the working man who wants also to be an active and involved father, the culture that takes its cue from the more traditional division of labour has to be changed. Individuals and families are paying a price - and so are employers. By enforcing unnecessarily inflexible working conditions, they demotivate fathers, put them under additional pressure, and risk losing many of their best employees.

Stealth parenting

The report provides evidence of fathers' reluctance to admit to parenting responsibilities. It can make them disinclined to ask for more flexible working practices. And it often drives them to lie rather than take time out for parenting purposes. Men "lack the tools and language" to ask for flexible work.

The report notes that men want greater flexibility in their hours, and more control over them. Women often negotiate larger chunks of time out from work - via part-time work and term-time working, which generally men don't go for.

We also have noted that so far the majority of home-based teleworkers are men (see our article on Telework: Who's doing it and why). I wonder how many of them have cited family reasons as the main reason for doing so? Generally, one expects that decisions for home-based working are built around the business case focusing on cost savings and productivity, not around family-friendly issues.

There is also the issue of career progression. Opting out of evening meetings, or being unable to stay late at the office can be death to a career. If you won't do it, the next man - or woman - will.

A high profile example can make all the difference. Like the chief executive who has his daughter's school performance written immovably into the staff calendar, or a senior manager setting a lead by taking paternity leave.

Five steps to father-friendliness

As always, the key question is "What is to be done?" The report offers organisations a five-step approach to becoming effectively father-friendly:

• A "Daddy Diagnostic" - find out the issues that fathers are dealing with, and audit existing HR policies
• Paternity leave - introduce provision that exceeds the statutory minimum to be introduced in April 2003
• Time sovereignty - increase working hours flexibility, giving people more control over the hours they work: "More than any single policy change, the modernisation of company attitudes towards working time will help working parents."
• Culture shift - taking responsibility at all levels to change attitudes towards fathering
• Good work - improving the quality of working life: so less stress and negativity is brought home.

This is an interesting, accessible and well-researched report, providing plenty of food for thought. At times you will have to just grimace and bear some clever-clever jauntiness, ever in search of a memorable phrase - examples include: "the best men are the pressed men", "we have seen the rise of dual-career couples; now we need dual-carer couples", and the cringe-worthy "Daddy diagnostic". The excursions into feminist thinking will be a touch arcane outside of academic circles, too.

But on the whole, this is a report well worth reading, as a prelude to action in one's own organisation.

Many thanks to Flexibility

for their kind permission to reproduce this article. Visit the Flexibility site for more excellent articles.

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